The Bachelor: Sister Wives?

THE BACHELOR

Part 2 of 2

Sister Wives?


Another dose of the Bachelor?!

Yes, we're on night two of the Bachelor.

And everyone is heading to frigid Canada, eh.

The girls are staying in a beautiful lodge overlooking a picturesque lake. The lake's name? Lake Louise. Makes me laugh every time I hear it. Lake Louise is going to show these chicks who's boss.

We learn there will be two one on one dates and a group date. Catherine, Drunk Daniella, and Tierra-dactyl  have not received one on ones yet. Although, it's hard to remember that for Tierra seeing as how she's slithered her way into every situation and date scenario possible.

The first one on one? It goes to Catherine. She's taken to a frozen tundra and placed in the middle of a blizzard to wait for Sean. Sounds super romantic, right?

Sean comes cruising up the mountain side through the snow storm with some sort of snow truck. Hope it's not stick! Okay, I promise, no more stick shift comments.

The date consists of frolicking in the snow during what looks like a blizzard. It looks awful, I'm just gonna say it. But then Catherine gets to finish the date off in an ice castle where she tells Sean about summer camp and how a tree fell over on a girl in front of her, killing her instantly. Now Sean's sure he loves her because of some kind of seizing the day explanation. I don't know. She gets a rose.

The group date did not disappoint. Apparently, jumping into zero degree water in a bikini is the way to really prove your love. Selma ain't buyin' it. Neither am I, girl. She opts out while the rest of the girls, through chattering teeth, run toward the icy lake. Everyone has the time of their life.

Except for Tierra.

She manages to plunge head first into hypothermia. She can't breathe, she's shivering, supposedly non responsive, her lips are blue, and she is taken back to the lodge by the paramedic where she can warm up. While back in her room she recovers with the help of oxygen from a nose cannula while in bed. Sean shows up. And, BOOM. Tierra has secured her one on one time.

Tierra
tvgasm.com

I have learned that it really doesn't matter if Tierra gets a one on one. She will create it on her own.

Leslie calls her a Tierra-ist. I decided Leslie is my favorite.

Oh yeah, Leslie also gets a rose after she spills her feelings to Sean. Sorry, Tierra! Extra oxygen does not secure you a rose this time. Better luck next accident.

It's at this time that Sean suddenly divulges that he is realizing he doesn't have romantic feelings for Sarah. He pulls her aside and proceeds to break her heart. It is the saddest kick to the curb in Bachelor history and I'm not just saying that. I really felt sad for her. Her reaction was just a little too real. I need drama, theatrics, and ridiculousness when someone is sent home so I can point and laugh at them. Sarah was truly heart broken and I just felt sad for her.

We then find out that Desiree gets a second one on one! (Gasp!)What's up with that? She has already had one! And Drunk Daniella hasn't had any!

That's okay, though. We like Des. Their date is a picnic in a field but only after repelling down the side of a cliff to get there. They finally make it to the food only to decide to climb trees afterward. These are active people! Does anybody ever just want to sit and watch TV? No? Just me?

They finish off their date in a tee pee where Des explains that there were times she lived in a tent when she was little. Thanks for the flashback, Sean. She gets a rose.

The rose ceremony brings us a busty Selma who, up until now, hasn't kissed Sean out of respect. But tonight it's time to throw culture and respect out the window. It's time for the "big guns," which for Selma means big boobs and a small kiss. "Sorry, Mom!" She doesn't get a rose, by the way. Wonder if it was worth it.

Drunk Daniella stumbles away rose-less. She's going home, too.

AshLEE has some time with Sean and brings a scarf. She explains some noise about trusting and blah blah blah. I'm not into AshLEE. Sorry I'm not sorry.

I saw a sock bun! Take a shot!

Anywho, now more than ever I'm convinced the producers or Sean or somebody is trying to kill these girls and the last one standing gets a proposal. Maybe. It's now Bachelor: Survivor Style.

We're getting serious next week. I mean Sean just told the girls he was happy with the six standing before him.

Sister wives!


8 comments:

  1. Hello! I found you on the blog hop. I'm your new follower, care to follow me back? Looking forward to reading more of your blog!
    Sarah x
    www.lookingasuare.blogspot.co.uk

    ReplyDelete
  2. Your re-caps make me laugh every time. You nail it perfectly.
    What about Tierra chowing down on the hamburger in the bed? She looked fine to me. If I ever miss a show I am definitely coming here for the update.

    Pia
    pjmscloset.blogspot.ca

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  3. Pia! So glad you can get caught up here! It really is a funny show! And fun to make fun of!

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  4. Ok this recap is hysterical. I havent watched in years, but sounds like not much has changed. I did see on E!News that people were predicting he ends up alone... hmmm.. sounds like even alone is better than being with some of those women lol

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  5. Glad you liked the recap! Nope. Nothing really changes except for the risk of death. That seems to be increasing.

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  6. It’s crazy to see how such a seemingly nice guy can turn into a bad one in a fraction of a second. He hasn’t seen Sarah one on one for a good period of time since their date and he wouldn’t even spend time with her to see if he didn’t feel differently. I agree that the hurt, shock and heartbreak was real with Sarah because he honestly made her feel that there was something more. I watched the episode preview in my office at DISH the night before and I saw that there was some drama but not who it involved so I was shocked to find out it was her. I made sure that my DISH Hopper is set to record the remaining episodes of the show and thanks to the PrimeTime Anytime feature I don’t have to set timers anymore. It automatically records shows in prime time on ABC, CBS, FOX, and NBC seven days a week. So now if the time and date change on the show or if there’s a two night event, I know that the show will be right there waiting for me when I’m ready to watch.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Sister Wives! That is too funny!
    I genuinely felt so bad for Sarah, he should be ashamed. But then again, she deserves better than that.

    Thank you so much for stopping by Snack Cups and Smiles via the Aloha Friday Hop! I'm following you through all the social media outlets available on your blog including email, but please, don't let my "stalking" alarm you, I promise to share your posts.

    With Smiles,
    Angie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you so much for following! Stalk away!

      Delete

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