The Bachelor: Family Sabotage

The Bachelor

Family Sabotage


Hello, hometown dates!

It's that time again! Time for the Bachelor to visit the families of his potential suitors.

We start with a very eager AshLEE who is super excited. She claims she had no clue what love was prior to the millisecond she has experienced with Sean. Somehow I'm not sure that's true and if it is then I'm sad for her.

AshLEE greets Sean with a picnic and they discuss their fathers both being pastors or preachers. Interesting. But guess what AshLEE is going to bring up. Trust issues. Fear of abandonment. I think it's time to start a drinking game again!

Every time you hear the word abandoment, take a shot. If it's in the context of fear of abandonment, that's a bonus shot. Game starts five minutes ago.

Sean and AshLEE have a beautiful outdoor dinner with AshLEE's parents where she starts telling them about the polar plunge from a few episodes ago. Somehow, she manages to take that story and make it about trust issues and abandonment. Get ready to take a shot.

AshLEE then proceeds to make her parents uncomfortable by talking about her rolling around with Sean in the sand. Then mom and dad grill Sean. Then Sean grills dad about AshLEE's insignificant teen wedding that he signed off on. Why is this an issue?

But then the hammer drops and AshLEE's sweet father tells the story about adopting AshLEE and what he wants for her. I hate when Bachelor gets genuinely sweet and deep because it makes me feel bad for making fun of everyone. But not for long.

Next stop...Seattle with Catherine! Seattle is fun! There are fish flying in the air, Sean is catching them, Catherine isn't catching them, which leads me to the question: If Catherine drops a fish, can they still sell it? I mean, if it lands on the floor and they can't sell it, it's kind of a waste, right?

Catherine and Sean look like they're genuinely having a ton of fun. That is until they go eat dinner at Catherine's family's house. Upon meeting Catherine's wicked sisters, they proceed to tell Sean all about flaky Miss Catherine and her track record with men. That'll totally make him swoon. And Catherine's mom just feeds Sean's uncertainty. So Catherine's hometown date didn't go as well as she had hoped.

Thanks family!

The next hometown visit brings us to Ft. Leonardwood, MO with Lindsay. Why do I remember that Army base's name? Personal anecdote: I lived there for almost a year. I have to say props to production for finding somewhere to go in Waynesville - the neighboring town. And I use the word town loosely.

So Sean and Lindsay find a cupcake shop to hang in and talk about how Sean should address her two star general father. She says, "Call him Marc." Yeeeeaah. I'm sure he'll appreciate that.

Lindsay gives Sean a quick basic training lesson administering a few spankings for discipline before taking him to meet her parents. And the parents? Turns out they're pretty cool. In fact, I have a crush on Lindsay's mom. She is way better than Lindsay. I vote Lindsay's mom gets a rose!

Then comes the awkward talk with Lindsay's dad. Sean basically has to kind of ask for his permission to potentially marry his daughter but not for sure. Who would say yes to that?

It goes something like this: "I'm not going to say I love your daughter but can I have your potential blessing if maybe I decided to think about giving her a ring?"

Charming.

Lindsay's cool parents give Sean some dog tags as a parting gift and he's on his way to his last hometown date with Des.

There's a reason they saved Des' hometown date for last. It was pretty much a disaster.

It starts out innocently enough with Des in yoga pants ready for a hike with Sean. They end the hike overlooking a smoggy LA skyline. Can you say romantic?

Des' date with Sean is making dinner for her strange family to come visit. Was calling them strange a spoiler?

Some dude shows up at the door and acts like Des has been his girlfriend for two years. Sean gets mad, kind of (eye roll) and that's when I'm thinking - thisisfakethisisfakethisisfake. And then we find out it's fake. She pranked Sean to get back at him for pranking her on their first date. Get it?! 'Member?! So hilarious. Not really.


This is when Des' family shows up and ridiculousness ensues.

Her dumb brother tells Sean he wants to "Holla at cha" outside. Is this dude serious? He then tells Sean he's a playboy and more nonsensical noise comes from brother. Sean is offended. I don't know why anybody would be offended by what Kevin Federline has to say. And he's seriously related to Des?

The whole thing spirals downward as dumb brother keeps making snide, inauthentic comments. I don't really believe that he cares about who Des is dating. He keeps vomiting things like, "I don't want this."
"This isn't right."
Is anybody buying that he really cares about anything more than ninety-nine cent tacos at Jack in the Box?

Another family ruins everything.

At the rose ceremony Sean is uncertain and hasn't really made up his mind. Before he begins, Des pulls him aside to apologize for her hot mess of a family. He starts giving roses away (where's Lindsay's mom?) and the first two go to AshLEE and Lindsay, who I'm convinced are the same person.

When one dramatic rose remains, Sean books it for some thinking time. He comes back to give away the last rose and he chooses...Catherine! Des' talk with him didn't work and Sean runs as fast as he can away from Des and Kevin Federline.

And, of course, Des didn't get a rose. She was wearing a sparkly, gold dress and it was black dress day at the rose ceremony. Sorry Des. Should've worn a black dress...and you should've never introduced Sean to your dumb brother.

A couple thoughts about this episode...I have never seen such family sabotage during hometown visits. What is up with these families trying to tear their spawn down? Des really has only one person to blame for not getting the final rose and that's her brother.

As far as favorites, I don't have one. I haven't been a fan of Lindsay but after this episode and seeing how it's now slim pickings, I like her a little more than I like AshLEE. And if you're wondering who Lindsay is, I've previously referred to her as Wedding Dress Girl. Yup. That one.

But I'm concerned about AshLEE if she doesn't receive the final rose. She seems fragile and overly eager to have Sean. I don't think she can handle being ABANDONED. (Shot).

Tomorrow night is a special sit down with Sean to talk about his reaction to seeing the women (Tierra) and their antics all season. He talks about being pissed and tricked and having opinions and stuff that's not interesting. Still watching.

Next week...Thailand. This is where Sean can't say he's in love with anybody quite yet. Wait. Didn't that just happen for the last five episodes? At least there are only three ladies on the horizon.

AshLEE AshLee F.
Catherine Catherine
Lindsay Lindsay

One more thing. Potential Bachelor participants: Maybe hire a family in order not to scare the Bachelor off. Just a thought.






5 comments:

  1. So I don't watch the show at all and I never have but I totally just read your whole recap. I will tell you that the scene with Catherine catching fish was mostly set up because they don't let just anyone catch the fish.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Absolutely! And when I went to Seattle I could barely see the fish throwing because of the huge crowd!

      Delete
  2. Newest follower here! I found you though the blog hop! Cute blog, I can't wait to read more. You can visit me at meandmr.com

    -Melanie @ meandmr.com

    ReplyDelete

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